When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
