So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize