is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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