She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
