So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
