So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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