And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
