I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
