i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
