Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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