HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
