you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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