i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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