wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
