If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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