speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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