I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
