if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
