I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
In America we eat man semen.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize