In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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