You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
