a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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