So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Say something about gay babies.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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