So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
