So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
