Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
FUCK WHALES
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
