dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize