OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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