I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My vagina is officially offended.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
