sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize