oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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