is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Randomize
