I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Vodka?
Forever.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize