Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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