It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
