it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
