Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
