So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
