I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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