I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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