Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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