Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
