Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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