My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
