New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
