Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
