she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
