can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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