I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
