Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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